Gail’s mother Grace had been dead for almost 6 months before
Gail found out. She had been travelling
to “find herself”. Gail visited the cemetery and
all she could see was a small headstone marking the grave, her mother’s brother
thinking she would want to arrange a more permanent memorial herself. He claimed he couldn't locate her in Asia,
but she was never more than a few days away from email contact.
When grief should have been beginning to diminish, Gail was
caught in its sharpest grip. There was
nobody to help her clear the house which had stood empty since the night the
ambulance drove Grace away. Dishes sat
on the draining board, left to air dry and never put away. Mail piled up behind the front door, mostly
flyers and electioneering leaflets for councillors chasing every extra vote. Gail wondered if they had knocked at the door
to enquire whether they could offer Mrs Burton a lift to the polling station, not
noticing that the curtains never moved and inside a layer of thick dust was building
up on everything.
Her father had bought them an upright piano when Gail
started lessons in 1979. Her own
interest barely lasted into the 80s, whilst her mother discovered she had a
musical ear nobody else in the family shared.
Grace took lessons for several years and kept the piano in her lounge even
after Gail left home. The lid was up and
the keys coated with dust. She knew her
mother always kept the lid down when she wasn’t playing, so had she been sitting on
the piano stool when the chest pains struck?
Or simply distracted by the phone or doorbell and forgotten to lower it?
Gail pulled out the stool and sat, placing her fingers over
the notes. She traced out the notes of
childhood songs she could remember, lifting dust away with her fingertips. Her mother had loved Ravel and taught Gail
Bolero when it became popular in the 1984 Winter Olympics. Gail picked out the first few notes on the keys,
finding her way around the keyboard slowly then with more confidence. She closed her eyes, feeling the music flow
and imagined Torville and Dean gliding across the ice to perfect sixes whilst
her mother listened from her favourite chair.
Sad but beautiful. I'm glad she was able to find her mother in the music.
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