If it hadn’t happened Callum would never have discovered his wife
was a robot. Katie was perfect in every
way that was important to him and they were a wonderful match. Everybody said they were made for each other
and in her case, they were more right than they could have imagined.
Grammar, that’s what did it.
When the grammar code started to fail in her programming and she began
using grocers’ apostrophes and misusing its and it’s, he thought she was doing
it to tease him. He pointed out her mistakes
and she said she was disinterested. He
showed her examples and she said it had no affect on her.
Callum reminded Katie of the conversations they’d shared, laughing together
at online images showing bad punctuation and discussing what things really
meant when the apostrophe went the wrong side of an ‘s’. She said so what if their wrong, that’s they’re
problem.
He said she used to care about that kind of thing and what happened
to change that. She said she thought
maybe a footballer scoring against his old club might really be ironic. She slapped him in the face and accompanied it
with the declaration “White faded to grey and Strunk is stupid bastard.”
When he grabbed her arm to stop her hitting him again, he felt a
slip of very realistic rubberized skin on metallic sub-structure. He heard a little whirr and a clicking as her
eyes turned to meet his gaze and he wondered how he ever could have failed to
notice such an obvious thing about a woman he’d spent three years with. Maybe he could still love her, if she got an
upgrade or a patch to fix her glitch.
But when she said she was no different than when they first met and
what did it matter if she thought ‘10 items or less’ was correct, he reached
deep into the back of her head, removed the battery pack and threw it would of
the window onto the street below.
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